Unwissenheit

dayyum.



you just happened to be there,

and i just happened to find you.

you were no ordinary,

and i walked in to be entranced by you.

in countable months,

you gave a beatific rhapsody.

i got to reach the highest point of ecstatism,

that vibration,

where young infatuated people kept talking about,

how my tummy gets warm, even when it's full of shit.

then there it went,

you changed,

you got old.

and i remain weak, here.

watching helplessly,

how you play that ignorant act,

for this big role.

i could just loathe you,

tell you to,

go fuck yourself,

but i never did.

i swear and curse,

but nothing changed.

cause the words don't remain there,

stationary, still in the moving air,

they run, and were forgotten.

so were yours,

it never seem to hit you,

you can't even recall any of it,

when i got it trapped inside here,

singing every pause.

you kept reappearing once in a while,

and i faked, every single second given to be spent with you.

wake up calls ring endlessly,

still i never accept any,

i stay here, in my happy place,

papers and ink,

quixotic,

yet it will never happen.

yet i still waste my time,

writing crap.



you're such a something.


shibbalgoddamnit